Horror.

"i think your daddy's going to divorce me."


I'm positive that's the most horrifying thing she could have ever said to me today.
I'm so positive.

I'm so worried that it's true.
That would be one of my greatest fears coming true.
It would break my heart and create a black hole inside my body.
My life would spiral downward.
I think my mother would kill herself.
This would set her overboard and she wouldn't be able to take it anymore...
I wouldn't be able to either.
I would need some serious medication just to be okay.
I would probably resort to rebellion and drugs.
Maggie, get some pills ready for me, just in case.

So tonight I'm going to bed crying because Charlie's not on AIM to distract me and I don't want to call him. Connor's probably not going to be able stop the nightmares I'll be having tonight.
Goodbye.
I'll let you watch me randomly burst into tears at school tomorrow.
I'll let you stand and just watch.
You won't touch me.
You won't even lie and say everything will be okay.
You won't know what do with yourself.